Twenty five years ago, my mother passed away. In anticipation of this, I typed up a long blog entry that described her last day, but it made me sad, and that’s not what I want to see pop up as a memory in the future.
I would much rather remember the happy times. At that time I was 25, in the midst of planning a wedding that would take place the following September, and working at the second full time position in my young career. Before she left, Mom was in on the big decisions regarding my wedding: my dress, the wedding location, and a few aspects of the day. I tucked her blue handkerchief into my sleeve as my “something old and something blue.”
I’ve shared before that her last gift to me was independence, as I had never lived alone until her passing. Looking back, Mom equipped me with the skills I needed to survive. She encouraged me to pay attention to how I felt and that everyone wasn’t my friend. My goodness, how right she was in a few key instances!
She knew I loved her and I am grateful for the 57 years she had here. I’m also grateful that she is no longer in pain because at the time of her death, she was a very sick lady. She loved G and even though she wasn’t thrilled with his career choice, she was proud of the man he grew to become. My siblings and I weren’t always close, so she would be happy to know that we now have an active group text chat and have fun together. Some of you who “really” know me know this is truly monumental.
I often say that I don’t have many regrets in my life, but I sure wish that I had video footage of her. Back then I had a video camera but I never filmed her. I don’t think she cared about home videos but I should have insisted. Oh well. I have a cassette tape of her singing at church that I listen to every once in a while. While my friends have countless videos on their phones of their parents, I’m literally holding onto the memories I have in my mind. Cherish your people while you can.
Here’s to you, Miss Lou.
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