It’s Our Anniversary

Soon, G and I will celebrate our 22nd anniversary. If anyone who has been married longer than a second says that they’ve never had an argument, they’re lying.  You’re not always going to agree with the other person. There’s going to be something that just sticks in your craw, and how you handle it is your choice. 

I’ve shared before that I didn’t see love shown in the traditional sense between my parents, so rather than perpetuate that same thing in my marriage, it’s important that we work to have a loving home in the following ways. 

We always greet each other with a kiss when we get home or when we leave. Even if we have just had a disagreement, and it’s a quick peck, it’s pretty much a rule that we say, “see ya later,” and go our separate ways. 

I know that he can’t read my mind. I might look at him a certain way which will signal that I’m unhappy, but unless I express it, I can’t expect him to know. In the early days of our marriage, I didn’t get it, and it caused a lot of unnecessary squabbles. Youth is wasted on the young they say. 

To piggyback on the previous point, it is each person’s responsibility to let the other know what they need. You would think this doesn’t need to be mentioned, but G might not know that I need something done a certain way and vice versa. If he tells me something that he needs and I fail to meet that need, I have not done my best by him. 

Also, the last thing I’m going to do is go to social media to air any grievances. Sure, I’ll post pictures that G has taken of me while I’m sleeping or refer to him as my lovable curmudgeon, but I don’t want fifty eleven people weighing in on what I should do, and if it’s bad enough, I’ll have fifty eleven people looking at me sideways because of what I chose to do. I know I’m not the only person to screenshot something and send it to a friend wondering what is going on with Jack and Diane. I don’t want y’all texting about me either!

I said it before and I’ll say it again: marriage is hard, but I’m thankful that I chose to enter this relationship with my best friend. Have some friends in which to confide, consult a therapist, counselor, psychologist, psychiatrist, or do whatever you need to do (within reason) to protect your relationship. You are each with whom the other has chosen to do this life thing. Be good to one another.

#ksmithsays